Flying

So, the other day, I went flying with my friend Dave.  You know - I trusted that guy; I really did.  I thought he knew what he was doing.   Anyway, I'll get to the point. 

We meet up at the regional airport, like we had planned.  And he's totally unprepared - asking the guy at the front desk how the whole airplane thing works, asking if he needs any sort of special training or a license to get the thing off the ground.  I figured if he asked me to go flying with him, he would have at least taken a few lessons or something.  So, I start freaking out.  He assures me - it's fine, it's fine.

So, we get up in the air - takeoff wasn't so bad.  And we're cruising around.  I'm a little less nervous now.  He seems to know what he's doing.  He points out this seagull off in the sky to our left, and I say (jokingly), "Dude, turn back around and hit it."  Before I get a chance to take the words back, he's pulled a 180 in the air and is cruising after the bird.  Inside, I'm screaming, "WTF!" but I don't scream outloud in vessels in the sky, after that whole hot air balloon incident.  So, we go racing after the bird.  I'm terrified, but I hardly have time to think before he hits the bird with the front of the plane.  THUD! as the majority of the bird's body hits the front windshield, and then bird guts and blood all over the windshield and outside of the plane.  I mean, c'mon dude - I WAS ONLY KIDDING!!

I don't remember the rest of the trip, but I do remember being safely on the ground and the maintenance crew asking what had happened and why the front of the plane was covered in blood.  I have no idea what I said in response.  I was just concentrating on moving my legs, one foot in front of the other, until I was off the tarmac, away from that crazy fuck, and safely in my car en route to the commune.

Lesson:  Never joke about hitting a bird when you're flying with Little Dave.
Cavutto on
cavutto
That's insane. Did he really do that?
tortfeasor on
tortfeasor
Maybe.
tortfeasor
Female - 31 years old
MARLBOROUGH, CT
United States
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