The Future of this Whole Internet Fad

Dude, so last night I was lying in bed, eating my girl scout cookies, and reading a book on internet law. More specifically, I was browsing two books I picked up at the public library last week on e-commerce and internet law. Not the same thing, of course.

I thought I would share some of what I learned while reading "Internet Law and Business Handbook" and "The GigaLaw Guide to Internet Law: The One-Stop Legal Resource for Conducting Business Online."

Here are some quotes from my books on the history and current status of the internet:
1. "Before 1993, the applications used on the Internet, with the exception of email, were too confusing to use for most people." Lesson - the internet is complicated, and lots of people are dumb.
2. "Less than 5 percent of the people using the Internet today were using it five years ago and less than 0.1 percent were using it ten years ago." Oh, wait. I was using the internet ten years ago. I must've been ahead of the game. No other explanation.
3. "The final characteristic of Internet market companies is that they must be well-funded. A quick look at the results of most of these companies will show that only a handful are profitable yet and most are probably years from profitability." So, this internet thing hasn't really produced as much as people had hoped. Companies need to be really, really big to take advantage of the internet. No start-ups here. Maybe I should be worried about expanding into e-commerce. Good thing I read this book.

Here are some quotes from my books on the future of the internet:
1. "Companies who use the Internet as their primary market and Internet sales as their primary revenue generator are still the exception to the rule." Oooh! Another warning - still need bricks and mortar to make your company work. This whole "I-only-exist-online" thing is not a good idea.
2. "For large companies selling online, Internet sales are generally successful and improve revenues and profitability, but the jury is still out on the aggressive new business models of the Internet market companies." The jury's still out? Good thing I read this book. I wouldn't want to get all excited about the internet if it's not really going to take off .
3. "By 2006, almost half the workforce will be employed by industries that are either producers or heavy users of information technology products." So, this internet thing is really going to take off by 2006. That's good. I can't wait for 2006. I wonder what I'll be doing then. I can't wait for 2006. I hope I'm rich then.

Here's what I really learned:
Only dumbasses, when wanting to learn about internet law, read a book about the internet. I mean, really, Tort! A book on the internet! Why use a medium so current? Why didn't you look at cave drawings about the internet? Maybe that could help you in your research. Or maybe you could do a focus group with old people in nursing homes. You know, get their views on this whole internet thing. They've been around a long time and are very wise, so they would be the best source of information. Dumbass.